That’s what I am.
I went in to work today, rushed to get all my work done and then raced home to beach my bloated ass in bed. You have no idea how hard it is for me to just lay here. Grrr. The only thing fierce enough to make me do it is the gripping pain whenever I stand up. I mean really, I’ve contemplated if it would be possible for me to somehow get off the bed and crawl on all fours to the bathroom to pee, or perhaps there’s a jar big enough so I don’t have to leave bed at all. I am however, thankful that the Baker and I splurged for this nice mattress. I am giant. I am on a mattress. I am the “Mattress Giant”…..”ooooooh, aaaaaaah, oooooh, ahhhhhh, only the mattress giant.” (please tell me y’all have these commercials where ever you live, they are amazing and the epitome of cheese)
