Beta (HCG level) is 30. 10 is considered positive. With Julia my beta was 238. I’m still spotting. Had a few mild cramps today, but less then yesterday. My boobs have “felt pregnant” but that’s about all. Oh, man have I been crying. I’m working super hard at being excited for a positive! But those of us familar with the IF world know that 30 can ominous. On the other hand, it can be normal. I’ll be making it a point to trust God and His will, whatever it may be. It’s obviously my heart’s desire that God is giving us the oppurtunity to witness a miracle. Please, everyone, pray. I’m going back in on Thursday for another beta, it needs to at least double, the higher the number the better.
Knots
My stomach is in knots. Today I discovered some super light pink/brown spotting. I have also started in with some mild cramping. My boobs started hurting. I’m bracing for the worst, but hoping for the best. I called the RE’s office and was told just to come in for the beta as planned, the nurse added that they have lots of spotting, bleeding, pregnant women. I’ve been working hard and trying not to worry and just doing my best to leave it up to God. It just feels so wrong not to worry. I will be devastated if the beta is not good. Oh, my – please pray for us! We really need it.
Bruiser & Cruiser
Meet Bruiser & Cruiser!
This morning’s transfer went well and it’s my deepest desire that these two are burrowing in for the long haul! Please, everyone, be saying your prayers!!! Beta is on the books for Tuesday, October 20th.
Egg-cellent!
Just got the call from the ARTs lab. Whew. I was really worried, but here are the stats.
3 are excellent (grade 1 of 5). Of those 3, 1 of them is 10 cells! 2 of them are 8 cells!
4 are good, all of these 4 are 8 cells!
2 are average, both of these are 8 cells!
2 are poor, at only 3 cells each.
I’m very relieved that 7 of our 9 are doing well. I was nervous that all would have stopped growing. We’re scheduled for a 9AM transfer on Sunday, must arrive at the ARTs lab at 8:30AM. Please pray that our babies continue to grow on schedule!
***Update. Apparently, I can’t add. 9 of our 9 are doing well and 2 of the 5 they were watching made it to 3 cells.
Fert Report
Fertilization report came in.
24 eggs
16 mature
Of the 16 mature eggs,
16 were ICSI’d
Of those 16 embryo’s
9 are showing positive signs of growth
5 are not showing any signs of growth but will continue to recieve the TLC of the lab just to make sure they didn’t miss any.
2 are dead.
My mind and gut are spinning. We are set for a 5 day transfer. I am grateful for 9 embryo’s. I am worried about “only” 9 embryo’s. That seems so objectively ridiculous, but no so ridiculous when you consider that last time we had 14 embryo’s and all but 2 died on day 3. The 2 that survived were transfered. 1 of those made our beautiful Julia. I asked what those 2 embryo’s were graded, with AAA being the best and not so best being EEE. Both were graded DCC. So, since we did have 9 embryo’s die on day 3, I’m concerned that we might show up on Sunday and be told there are no babies to transfer. I’m trying my absolute best to be hopeful, to trust God, to trust that God’s will is best (whether that is a baby or no baby), but honestly, it’s hard. I’m a very analytical, fact focused person. I will remain tied to the fact that it only takes one. Please keep us and our 9 “dish” babies in your prayers!
Power Nap
Well, went in today for the retrieval. It was fantastic!! I was doing super well and was the picture of calm, I even made some jokes and gave my RE a pair of fuzzy Easter bunny ears since she was egg hunting after all, but then the anesthesiologist came and gave his speech, when he left and I was walking into the OR I cried a smidge, b/c seriously what if I died? He nipped that in the bud by giving me, in his words some ”I don’t care” medicine. And care I did not! In fact I remember making some pretty bad jokes! I went back into the OR at 7:15AM and I woke up covered with warm blankets at 7:50. It was a serious power nap. Man, did I feel like I was OUT! But, not even a hint of nausea or any other side effect. My RE came in and let me know that they retrieved 24 eggs and that I should start my progesterone shots tomorrow night. We left the hospital at 8:15ish I think and took Jewels to daycare, went to eat breakfast at Le Madeliene’s, and then I came home and slept some more. Really, I can’t say enough about how great the experience is. It’s all in the details, the super fantastic nurses, the funny embryologist, the warm blankets, the fact that they numb your arm before starting an IV, just all these small measures to make sure that the experience is as good as it can be.
Gotta be honest…
I’m a little nervous about the anesthesia tomorrow. Yikes! I’m sure I’ll be fine, and last year it was great, just like a little nap. But – I’m a worry wart and anesthsia just generally scares me, in fact, it scares me even more than a foot long needle. Anywho, I talked to the nurse to today to confirm the retrieval tomorrow and I asked what my e2 was yesterday for record keeping purposes. It was 1290. 1290. Woot!
Festive!
Didn’t get around to posting on Friday like I should have, but I had 15 – 16 follicles and my e2 was 500 something, I think 583 but I can’t be sure. Anyhow, I went in today for blood work and Mr. Sono. The backup team is always there on the weekend, the lady who took my blood said she thought the MD would trigger me tonight b/c in her words, my “ovaries are quite festive.” Well, then I got the call – trigger tonight at 7PM, be at the hospital at 6AM on Tuesday for retrieval. Naturally, I asked…so how many follicles did I have today? “26″ Twenty six!!! Woot!!!! Let’s hope that we wind up with lots of good embies and at least one that sticks! Lining was near 10mm.
E2 Three & Mr. Sono
Yesterday was my third E2. It was at 187. 187. 187. Last time is was 300 something. Sigh. I’ve been told the number is only there to make sure it hasn’t skyrocketed or something and was really matters is what Mr. Sono (I still sing the Mr. Ro-bot-to song whenever I type the word) has to say.
What say he, you ask? Well I’ll tell you.
14 follicles – a vast right wing conspiracy.
On the right side there are 8 follicles:
10.5 cm
11 cm
9 cm
9.5 cm
9.5 cm
8.5 cm
7.5 cm
9 cm
On the left, 6 follices:
9.5 cm
9 cm
8.5 cm
10.5 cm
10 cm
10 cm
So – she upped my Gonal-F to 187.50 per night, which I started last night. I’ll back in for another fun visit with Mr. Sono tomorrow.
E2 Two
Went in to see the vamp today, got my E2 results this afternoon. I’m running a cool 91 after two 150 doses of Gonal-F (the elixir of life?). By comparison, I was at 133 the last go round. Naturally, I working hard to fend off all those nasty thoughts about why today’s E2 is lower and settling on each cycle is different and my hormones are probably different post-partum style.
